Hil Force One

Welcome aboard:

"Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, and welcome aboard
the maiden flight of Hil Force One," Clinton said over the
plane's intercom as it taxied down the runway en route
from Las Vegas to Reno, Nev.

"My name is Hillary and I am so pleased to have most of you
on board," she said.

"FAA regulations prohibit the use of any
cell phones, Blackberries or wireless devices that may be used
to transmit a negative story about me.

"In a few minutes, I am going to switch off the 'Fasten Your Seat
Belt' sign. However, I've learned lately that things can get awfully
bumpy when you least expect it—so you might want to keep those
seat belts fastened.

"And in the event of an unexpected drop in poll numbers, this
plane will be diverted to New Hampshire.

"If you look out from the right, you will see an America saddled
with tax cuts for the wealthiest and a war without end. If you look
out from the left, you will see an America with a strong middle class
at home and a strong reputation in the world.

"Once we've reached cruising altitude, we'll be offering in-flight
entertainment: my stump speech.

"Once again, thank you for joining us on Hil Force One. We know
you have choices when you fly, and so we are grateful that you
chose the plane with the most experienced crew. And so we are
grateful that you chose the plane with the most experienced
candidate."

You should fasten your seat belt too, Hill. The next few weeks will
be a bumpy ride for you.